Fauzi Rassull: Singapore's Only Male Bitch

Singapore's Only Male Bitch

I managed to retrieve a copy of this video at last, girls. It was hidden somewhere, beind the curtain of "My Computer" shit folder. Hahaha. Who would have thought, eh??

Play! Play! Play! And tell meh who is this 10000 dollars baby is?

Yes I know. Don't ask. I'm so random right now.

Shoutout: Bitching coming up next at a later time. Stay tuned, dollies =))

pp//ss: Also. Do remember to watch "ASIAN DOLLS" music video just above my tagboard. It's a MUSST watch. I swear it's hilarious.

I love Hirzi, can. =))

Labels: Random, Video

Fever Fever Fever

I'm feeling feverish. And yes, I'm gonna be sick in a couple of hours.

"Get Well Soon" message on my tag ya'll.

By the way, I'm going ST JAMES now to partay!

time check (10:22pm)

Labels: Random

Random

Whatever la eh, fuckers

Enjoy this picture of meh and part of Voguelicious..

As usual, pictorial galore up on the morrow!!!!!

*Who the hell is JP here and Jay Pe~~nis~~

Labels: n, Random

I'm Making You Horny

This blog exist to make you feel horny. And that's what I'm going to do. Let's play pictorial for now. The last time I showered my blog with photos were like 2 months ago and it feels like a year. Can ya'll imagine how absurd my brain works? 2 months and what? A year? Who am I kidding, eh?

Like they say, let the pictures tell the story.

Oh shut up! We all know I'm fat. I don't see the need to hide my fatty patty fat fat badunkadunk. Those pictorials are fresh and real! I don't care. Pictures are deceiving toys, remember??

I love to camwhore alot. It's in my job's blood. I'm a part-time model. Who am I kidding? Don't let me brag because I will. And I am good at it. =)

Labels: Attention, Fauzi Rassull, Media Attention, Online Attention, Pictorial, Picture Sensation, Porn, Random, Rated-21

Girls For Sale? Lots Of Them In Here

I was on google earlier on and out of the blue, I stumbled across this blog out of nowhere. I don't know the purpose of this blog exist.

Let's get to the point, shall we? This blog is number one on the list for the "Most Horniest Blog That Make Guys Horny" whatever that means. Hahahahaha. In here, we will see hundreds and thousands and a million pictures of girls who got featured right there. Nah, not young girls of course, dude.

*******************************
Check it out yourself and tell me what you think.
http://asian-eye-candy.blogspot.com
*******************************

On that note, I think men should be treated fairly, no? Come on ya'll, men wants to be featured as well. Hahahaa.

Anywho for instant attention, try this. Applications are always open for all of us. It's free, remember. Boys are also welcome I think. Anyway, who cares? Boys can be girls and vice versa. Haha.

Oh fuck, this blogger could be a geek, a nerd or some maniac on the street ya'll. I was just wondering, how long has this blog been running? There seem to be over hundreds of pictures here and there.

Labels: Asian, Attention, Bitching, Blog, Random

5 Easiest Steps To Increase Google Pagerank

First thing first, Im not an internet freak.

What is Google Page Rank?
Most of us knew by know what that means. However for some dimwits out there who don't even know a thing about it, here you go. Google Page rank is based on back links. Back links are Links pointing to your website from another website. The more back links you have the higher your PR will be.

What should you then?

Kill yourself. Oh no wait. Hahaha.

1) Join forums
Tell you what, forums are a great way to achieve links to your website. Did you ya'll know that in most forums you are allowed to have a signature? Yeah, that's where you can put a link to your website. Simple???

2) Submit to search engine directories
Submitting your page to directories basically increase your chances at being listed higher on popular search engines like Google yadda yadda yadda..

3) Using ezine ads (or newsletters)
When you create an ezine you will be able to keep people coming back to your website for more by using signatures and giving special deals. This is so true ya'll.

4) Creating and publishing articles
No doubt that articles are an easy source of generating new traffic. Take note, you have to include your signature in your article and why? It brings in hella more more and more traffic from article submission directories.

5) Links from related websites.
I know this is hard thing to do. It's frustrating, no? To find related websites, all you bastards need to do is go to a search engine, say Google, and type in your subject. Maybe your website is based on ford mustangs.

Go to Google and type in ford mustangs, than you look around for pages that are somewhat related to your website. After you have done this (which should be very easy) you have to contact them in some way to get your link posted on their website. This can be the most difficult task because a lot of webmasters ignore e-mail's from people requesting links because they don't see the importance of it at the time. Or maybe because they are rarely online or dead.

If you are cheap like me, then do it.

Labels: Attention, google, page rank tips, Random

What Is The (Your) Average Penis Size ?

So to ya'll ladies out there, at home or where ever you are right now, here is a little something which I think you should take note.

What is your boyfriend's average penis size?...
This is the question that you ladies want a real answer to. I know you too well. You ladies are one horny bitches.

If you are anything like me the phrase "average penis size" can mean many, many, many different things and leave you feeling confused about the definitive answer to it, no? Looking on-line will make things even more confusing due to the numerous surveys and studies conducted around this issue.

To the average man, penis is, consciously or unconsciously, one of the most important tools in the whole wide world. Who disagree should jolly well lick my toes (all of it). Men discovers it at an early age and completely fascinated by it.

'Isn't mine rather small?' Look at Daddy's, look at big brother's, look at our neighbour's, look at those in the men's locker room - and he asks himself if he will be as big as that. Hahaha.

Anyway, for all of us to know, a non-erect penis usually measures between 8.5cm and 10.5cm (3-4 inches) from tip to base.

Keep on masturbating your punani right now as you're reading my blog if you think you're wayyyyyyy below the average dudes.

ppp/sss: Call me if it still didn't work on you.. You need help there.

Labels: Bi-Sex, Bitching, Blog, Gay, Hetero, Lad, Porn, Random, Rated-21, Sex

Sex Inside Public Bus? Is it Cool Or What? (Safe For Work?)

And now for entertainment sake. I was browsing through some website earlier and I came across this. Everyone knows I love to share what I've got with you all, no? The last time we saw was on the road, no?

Anyway, I swear to you this is gotta be one hella cool action EVAR. No, it's not because it was directed in the bus. It's because I found it quite amazing when people actually put their hands together at the "END" part. Yes, it's applause for you dimwits/idiots. I don't know if they were celebrating a birthday thing or were they forced to clap both their shits together?

Get your cute butt in if you think your age is somewhere mine, 18? 19? 20++++?

Labels: Attention, Bi-Sex, Blog, Boobs, Gay, Hetero, Porn, Random, Rated-21, Real, Video

No Rehab For Me, Pleaseeeee

Fuck shit. Mom tried to make me go to rehab, and I said "Statistics Show that That's Not Always Effective". Hahaha. Which organization is more useless: FEMA, or the Promises Rehab Clinic in Malibu? Before you pretend to answer which I know you will, please watch Hyla Matthews' latest Alternatives to Rehab. Mom, look at this. Play it! Play it! Play it! Hahaha.

Labels: Blog, Celebrity, Random, Video

Remarks Are Just Remarks. Why Get Offended?

I don't feel offended by any remarks. I'm insensitive to all of this. I just love the way people react to certain things. I mean isn't it fun, no?

But the general public is not like me. And I know people get offended easily just because they think certain remarks are offensive and hella defamatory.

Sometimes, I wonder what's so offensive that we need to react like as if someone or anywho killed your mom?

Or when I say "Bye Bitch" and "Fuck-Off" hella lots of times here to you all. I know someone reading this will be quite offended on my behalf, or would be offended with all the nasty words I used or cited above.

Please by all means, have some sense of humour bitch. Don't you want to look younger? So laugh alot.

Repeat After Me: REMARKS ARE JUST REMARKS

Labels: Blog, Random

Fast-Food Ads Are So Fake (PICTURES)

The past is new again ya'll.

Anyway, if you're flipping through a magazine and your eyes land on an ad to your favorite fast-food restaurant; MacDonald, Burger King, Subway blah blah blah. Mmm, that burger sure does look delicious, no! Suddenly you have to have it! You get into your car, drive to the local fast-food joint and purchase the coveted burger. However, when you open up the wrapper, things sure look a whole lot different from from the magazine. That's OK, you hardly notice and gulp it down regardless of how it looks. Sound familiar? Well, I experienced it for alot of times. Anyway, I bet the third world aren't surprised with that. Hahahaha. *laughs sarcastically.

Such is the world of fast-food advertising. Fast-food purveyors don't need to make every burger, taco or salad look picture-perfect -- just the one to reel you in. So what tricks do professional photographers use to create ads that make you salivate?

The following says it all!!
· When shooting a bun with sesame seeds, carefully arrange them with glue and tweezers.

· Use waterproof spray on the surface so it won't get soggy.

· Cook just the outside of the meat and leave the center raw to keep it plump and moist.

· Paint the burger with oil and brown coloring.

· To make grill marks, brand the meat with a hot metal skewer.

· Use paper towels to make a diaper for the meat so no juices leak on the bun.

· Find an attractive lettuce leaf with no brown spots.

· Use only center slices of the best tomato.

· Spray the tomato with a mist of water and glycerin to keep it looking fresh.

**Oh well, the process was taken in google. The rest, are pure shit from my ass.

Now the next time that glossy advertisement has you drooling, remember the item pictured most likely isn't even edible. Bon appetit! Always remember that if you experienced any burger that looks kinda disgusting, that is the third world burger. No offence.. This is my blog after all.

Labels: Bitching, Blog, Random

The Man Sexed Her Upside Down (VIDEO)

I don't know if it is the "in thing" or what but hearing young teens having sex here and there all the time is almost a cliche to me, no? Underaged sex is illegal. PERIOD.

Is that phrase clear enough? Or is it just you who couldn't be bothered and thinks that's bullshit? For I, I support underaged sex ya'll. It's cool. It's fun. Everyone wants that pleasure. Who don't?

Anyway, let's get to my point here. Part 3 of D'Most Ridiculous Sex Video Ever coming up people.

Get ready! Be ready! Strip yourself and hop onto your couch and let's enjoy.

But first thing first. This video you're about to watch is rated 18 years and above only. Anything below, you jolly well fuck off. I know I support underaged sex but hey, not for things like this.

Click this one if I you think I'm your next Singapore's Male Bitch

REPEAT AFTER ME NOW: UNDERAGED SEX IS FUN!!!!!

Labels: Bi-Sex, Blog, Gay, Hetero, Porn, Random, Rated-21, Real, Sex

Why I Hate X'Mas | X'Mas Greeting

It's always like this. Exchanging gift and stuff is not my thang. I've said this hella lots of times. Why waste my moolah buying gift to people who don't really appreciate things yadda yadda.

Anyway, let's get creative, shall we? Let the picture tells the story ya'll.

TO THEM, MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAVE A HAPPY NEW YEAR. Here is my all time favourite Christmas Carol. Have fun ya'll.

Labels: Random

About Hot Sex...

Hot Sex? It’s what everyone wants… Well that may be the case – but here at Staying Alive, we have to tell you – no matter how hot you are in the bedroom, it doesn’t really count, unless you’re safe with it.

Think about it – have unprotected sex – good while it lasts… Ok, but what about the consequences? You could so easily pick up an STI or even HIV – it just isn’t worth the risk.

Safe sex on the other hand, allows you to be HOT one hundred percent of the time. So if you remember one thing make it this– safe is hot and hot is safe. Staying Alive says so – OK!

pp/ss: I found this and kinda think this is useful for those maniacs who likes sex, sex and more sex.

Labels: Blog, Gay, Hetero, Lad, Ladies, Random, Sex

How Do You Stop Yourself From Having Dirty Thoughts???

I was doing my usual routine earlier and out of the blue, this question just pops out from nowhere. I'm not a scientist nor a doctor and I've got no idea how the brain works actually. Have you came across any situations when you're having a conversation with your friend for instance and in the middle of the convo, something distract you and ended up you not paying attention to what they were saying. Being distracted here means your brain is busy thinking with some other important issues (sex or anything weird). I wonder if this is natural to humans. I don't know.

I thank God every day, that people cannot read my mind. So when people ask what’s on my mind. I say "OH NOTHING". But, wouldn't you like to know what that nothing is?

Anyway, How do you stop your brain from thinking dirty?

To answer that, here are some answers I could think of. You can opt to believe it or not. I don't care.

1) Fauzi believe that we can stop thinking dirty by using a taser gun
2) Placing a rubber band around your wrist. When you find yourself thinking undesirable thoughts, gently give the rubber band a snap to remind yourself to change your thought process.
3) Wash your head with soap
4) Google "masturbation"

But hey, why would anyone want to? Who told you it was dirty? Life's pleasures are here for us to enjoy and celebrate ya'll, rememer??!!?

Labels: Blog, Random, Sex

I Won A Pair Of Tickets From Nuffnang

I received an email from Nuffnang awhile ago to notify that I won a pair of tickets to a movie.

Here is the screenshot of the email and it says:

Finally, I realised that I make sense when I blog. I don't bullshit. I don't fake it. So yeah. Any post that was kept inside here for days, months and even years is new again.
-----
THIS IS A BLOG CONTEST YA'LL

Famous Eating Place

As a Singaporean for close to 18 years and still counting, I have witness Singapore's ups and downs within that period of time.

Lau Pa Sat would be my desire choice to qualify for the national treasure. I don't know about you but I think Lau Pa Sat actually holds quite a lot of historical value in it. It was a wet market back then before it was being renovated. Right now, as you all know, Lau Pa Sat has now become Singaporeans favourite makan place EVAR among locals and well of course tourists, serving Singapore local food.

Like the open market in a bustling Asian capital it is, Lau Pa Sat offers a myriad of options for the ravished bar-closer. It’s always occupied and usually busy, but prime time is around 10. The din gets deafening and the service gets a little sharp, but the smells and tastes coat the atmosphere (not to mention stomachs sloshing with booze).

Built in 1894, Lau Pa Sat is close to 113 years old. Amazing, no? I am pretty sure all of us has been to Lau Pa Sat for at least once. Uniquely Singapore's food can be found there, ranging from satays, BBQ seafood, Hor funn or even frog legs (???) etc...

The old likes to go there for a cheap coffee drinking instead of having Starbucks whereas the middle aged people brings their family/friends there to have their meals for a change -- KFCs, McDonalds are so unhealthy ya'll. The young and hyper active kids still enjoyed their food no matter what even though they didn't get hamburgers.

On that note, this self-duped Singapore's Only Male Bitch thinks that Singaporeans are sure to know where to go and queue for the famous food stalls!

Click! Click! Click to http://www.bookofsecrets.com.sg/ to have a sneak peep of the latest movie called, National Tresure 2.

Blog URL: FauziRassull.Com
Name: Fauzi Rassull

Labels: Blog, Famous Food, Random, Uniquely Singapore